I might spin a psychological web with this one, but that is fine as long as no one tells me to lie down on the couch and tell them about my childhood. In fact, one of the things I dislike the most is to just sit and talk. Unless it has a purpose, like getting to know someone, I do not look forward to sitting and talking. Yet, I already left the topic for today of liberty.

I had liberty, of course I did. The only place I felt like I had liberty was in my house.

Don’t know how or why I came to the realization that the moment I walked out the door, I could no longer be me. When I was with just my friends, I was good, but I always wanted to be doing something. I did not think that what I had to offer in conversation was worthwhile to others.

Perhaps it was fear of rejection that drove me, but the world was one giant external hinderance to me expressing myself.

“Liberty is the freedom of individual to express, without external hindrances, his personality.” ~ G. D. H. Cole

According to Cole I had no liberty. Not looking for any sympathy here, because it was simply all in my own mind.

I could not even talk to girls. Yep, a complete dork. Moving on…

The point is that the mind is powerful. It felt like every group encountered and every situation with multiple people around was crushing my personality on the outside when it was entirely on the inside.

The biggest breakthrough can be credited to children. I worked at a summer camp and can say that the one thing I enjoyed was being myself with the kids. To my wife’s dismay, I could show that I had a lot of childlike behavior in my personality once we had our own kids. I loved having fun with the kids and still love having the same fun with my grandchildren. So grateful that my wife loves how I am with kids.

Strange thing is that when I became a classroom teacher, the fun I was having with children left me. After a year of complete misery in teaching, I almost quit because I knew that I was not being me. I was not enjoying the person that I was with them.

With a few changes, the whole teaching experience changed. I started using silly voices with them, and when one student responded to me in a solid English accent, off we went. I did a Mission Impossible routine on a bus ride back from Washington DC with our 8th graders. The prize was swiping someone’s candy bar sitting on a seat unattended, but my reward was the smiles from all who saw me dodging between seats.

I was expressing my personality.

Express your personality in all the ways you can on this Happy Friday.